Hi friends!!
Well, there is not much happening in the Rodger's residence outside of warm milk, diapers and baby coos. And I have to say that I am truly enjoying every moment of it. How blessed I have been as a mother to spend 6 months home with my sweet little girl, Lily. Colby and I have been soaking up this time with her. She is such a sweet little love bug. She loves to talk and coo and is just starting to giggle! It kills me!! So cute! She is also very sensitive. Loves to look you in the eyes and LOVES to take long warm baths and snuggle. She is doing so well and growing by the second it feels like. She is now 4 months old and weighs 11 pounds! And to think she was born at just 3 pounds! 4 months old!?!?!? Where did the time go??? So strange....Soon I will be going back to work just a few days a week and thankfully, only half days.
Motherhood is the best. Its the most emotionally RAW experience I have ever been through and this is only the beginning. The love I feel for my child is scary. Scary in the sense that I love her so deeply that I NEVER want anything to ever hurt her. Im sure all mamas can agree with this. I can't even handle when she gets her shots! A part of me knows that that is the reality of life, she will bump her head, she will scrape her knees, she will face-plant every once and a while as she tries to take her first steps...and then Im sure a few more times after that...and I will do my very best to catch her every time she looses her balance. She will go through ups and downs, heartbreaks and break-ups....and I will be there as a shoulder to cry on, hopefully some guidance and wisdom and to always remind her how beautiful she is and her great worth in God's eyes. Her Daddy and I will be there when friends come and go, days go by, her curiosity arises, and her independence expands.
We will be there to watch her play, watch her laugh and watch her grow and blossom into the beautiful creation that God has called into life inside of her. She is a gift. A gift from God, as every child is, and we will do our best to protect and love and raise her up in a way that honors our Lord.
Its crazy to think how overly easy it feels to mess up as parents, I sometimes just feel like a kid myself, and in the midst of trying to be a perfect mom, giving her everything she needs/wants, I am reminded of the best advice anyone has ever given me as a new mom....
"what matters the most is not how you did things, but that you did it with LOVE."
Per our conversation, she was actually talking to me about formula feeding and breast feeding because I was expressing my sadness for not being able to breast feed Lily due to prematurity. And this was her response.....I have resorted back to this, SO many times.
I know Im going to screw up as a mom, I probably already have in a few ways, but Im choosing to not look at motherhood from that outlook, Im choosing to do everything, to the best of my ability, out of LOVE. The most important thing, is that Lily knows that her Daddy and I LOVE her. And even more important than that, is that God loves her beyond measure.
